Pieces in the Times and the Sunday Herald both focus on artist Shahin Mem­ishi. Seek­ing asylum in Glas­gow, having been forced to flee his native Kosovo, Mem­ishi (an art teacher) had some­thing of a rev­e­la­tion on seeing work by the so-​called New Glas­gow Boys for the first time, and this show matches his por­traits of the artists he admires with exam­ples of their work.

I’m absolutely not having a go at the writ­ers of these pieces. The cura­to­r­ial con­ceit of show­ing a rel­a­tively unknown artist along­side the old guard who inspired him is intrigu­ing, the story of Mem­ishi find­ing suc­cour in their work is a good, moving one, and a show fea­tur­ing work by Steven Camp­bell, Ken Currie and Peter Howson is cer­tainly news­wor­thy. Also news­wor­thy is the fact that the works by these artists are from a pri­vate col­lec­tion, and are all for sale. Hmmn.

Anyway, here’s the thing: it’s an awful show. Awful. There’s some good stuff, sure, but none of it is by Mem­ishi, and the hang is far­ci­cal. Half the paint­ings are at wonky angles, a few are sat on the floor, and a decent set of Peter Howson draw­ings is placed so high on the wall that you’d need to stand on a chair to get a good look at them. One of Memishi’s paint­ings is set on an easel right in front of a Ken Currie, obscur­ing it com­pletely. The late Steven Campbell’s name is spelled ‘Stephen’, on the label beside his paint­ing and in the title of Memishi’s por­trait. Really. To me, that looks more like an insult to Currie and Camp­bell than a trib­ute. And so do Memishi’s paint­ings, how­ever well-​meant they may be. They don’t make you want to claw your eyes out in horror or any­thing, but they’re the sort of thing you see in those gallery-​cum-​shops that sell inof­fen­sive stuff by local artists along­side nov­elty tea-​towels and jew­ellry made by hob­by­ist house­wives. I’m amazed that his sub­jects, having seen his work, agreed to sit for him (Camp­bell didn’t, for obvi­ous rea­sons, but I’m told the rest did). And I nearly got the gig­gles when read­ing in the Times that Mem­ishi is, accord­ing to Ally Thomp­son, ‘one of a new breed of Euro­pean artists gal­vanis­ing the city’s art scene’. This is not the case.

So, the show doesn’t deserve the oxygen of pub­lic­ity - it should’ve been suf­fo­cated at birth! - but it drew more press than any exhi­bi­tion in Scot­land since the big Emin ret­ro­spec­tive and Campbell’s posthu­mous show­ing of new work.

My point, I sup­pose, is that it’s depress­ing that the visual arts only make the news pages when there’s a whiff of scan­dal, a record-​breaking auc­tion or, as in this case, a heart-​warming tale to be told. These things don’t have very much to do with art. My other point is that you shouldn’t waste your time vis­it­ing Art­De­Caf this month. Not for the art, anyway, though I feel duty bound to report that they make a pretty decent plate of scram­bled eggs.

Update: My review of the show was spiked, for rea­sons I prob­a­bly shouldn’t relate here, but you can read it on my Work weblog, if you like.

Prince is launch­ing his new Planet Earth album as a free give­away with a national Sunday news­pa­per in a move that has drawn wide­spread con­dem­na­tion from music retailers.

The 10-track CD will be avail­able free with an “imminent” edi­tion of the news­pa­per. Planet Earth will then go on sale on July 24.

How­ever it’s being dis­trib­uted, I’m sort of faintly excited about the record. The new single, Guitar is decent-​ish, in that it has won­der­fully silly lyrics, and reminds me of Girls & Boys a bit.

You can listen to it by click­ing the ‘play’ button below, or—more free stuff!—down­load it from 02.

[Click through to the site to listen to the audio]

My favourite News In Briefs gobbet is, I think, this one:

ANNA is shocked the Gov­ern­ment has taken so long to release its “terror attack” leaflet. She said: “Why has it taken so long to bring out a 22-page pam­phlet on basic plan­ning for emer­gen­cies like keep­ing a supply of bat­ter­ies, food and water? This should have been rushed out after 9/11.”

I know I always spec­ify the number of pages in a pam­phlet when making off the cuff polit­i­cal remarks, so it’s nice to see that Anna - 22, from London - does the same.

Of course, it’s little wonder that left­ist analy­sis of Page 3 has moved on to its role as a pro­pa­ganda tool, since any doubts anyone may have had about it being, you know, out­moded, exploita­tive and offen­sive pornog­ra­phy were quashed ear­lier this month by Shell Jubin, star of Big Brother and recip­i­ent of a First Class Hon­ours degree in Art His­tory from the Uni­ver­sity of Glas­gow. Just in case you missed her con­sid­ered thoughts:

Those who sneer at Page 3 lack intel­li­gence. It’s beautifully-​shot and taste­fully pio­neered the cel­e­bra­tion of the female form.

In many ways it eman­ci­pated women, let­ting them exploit their assets, earn cash and keep con­trol. I see it as a modern art form.

Inter­est­ingly, Ms. Jubin’s tits-​out remarks are not the first time she’s taken a post-​feminist stand. One of her tutors at Glas­gow (who will remain name­less, for obvi­ous rea­sons) was so appalled by the total dis­missal of fem­i­nism in one under­grad­u­ate essay that he returned it unmarked, save for the fol­low­ing statistic:

On aver­age, women in the UK earn 24.1% less an hour than men doing an equiv­a­lent job.

Who needs Heat when you have Submit Response?

You will need:

1. A copy of Heat magazine.
2. A copy of Good­bye, Baby­lon, the bespoke sex­tu­ple CD com­pi­la­tion of religous musics.

Now, simply play the com­pi­la­tion - any disc will do - and read the magazine.

It’s just a wild trip, man. I’m going to write a report for Erowid about it, right away.