Down Metafilter way, the bloggers are blogging the fight between bloggers about the way we blog. This is a special case, where even The Pixie Test cannot help us.

According to this ‘What Pixies song are you?’ stupid quiz page, I’m ‘Where is my mind?’. Well, the write-up (see below) is fairly convincing. I’m guessing that Wil Wheaton did the same test and came up with the same result….

Jay Z + 50 Cent: Mr. Cent’s comparatively small frame and use of cute terms like ‘Shorty’ give him the Pixie edge. Mr. Z, as you well know, looks like a freaking great ogre.

Margaret Drabble + A.S. Byatt: Null and void, since they can both fuck off. But, if you insist on applying the test: Drabble - Pixie-style gamine bob haircut. Byatt - Incredible Hulk. Therefore, Drabble wins.

Jordan + Jodie Marsh: An exception to prove the rule? While Jordan is clearly a sweetheart, and will win this battle, Marsh wins out on The Test thanks to her more petite appendages, and a low-rent nose-job gives her a certain Pixie-esque aspect. And she has shagged a member of Westlife, whereas Jordan has merely expressed the desire to shag all of them at once - obviously, Westlife are Little People of some sort, so contact ups Marsh’s Pixie Quotient.

Britney Spears + Xtina Aguilera: Simple, Ms.Spears’ massive thighs indicate that she is non-Pixie. You should henceforth root for the dirrrty one.

Martin Amis + Julian Barnes: Interesting one. While Barnes has a thin, Pixie-esque nose, he is overly aquiline to be considered fully Pixie. Amis, and this is stretching it, squeezes out a fair amount of Pixie-level whimsy into his prose. I declare him victor.

1. Jay Z + 50 Cent
2. Margaret Drabble + A.S. Byatt
3. Jordan + Jodie Marsh
4. Britney Spears + Xtina Aguilera
5. Martin Amis + Julian Barnes

Tom Coates (who has stealthily added visible titles to his blog posts recently) is having trouble taking the necho kerfluffle seriously. Jack Mottram says the side in any debate that most closely resembles darling little pixies must be right, and denie…